No, it’s not Crackerjack. I start off this week with exciting news. Well, I think it’s exciting.

The Bragg family is going to give you all a very special Christmas card. It lies beneath the puzzle that you see on this post!

What do you have to do to get this amazing card, which features a huge, hyper, mega star of the Bragg family and some other favourites enjoying Christmas? Read on.

Well, it’s a puzzle, and I will remove pieces of the puzzle depending on how much money I can raise for the MNDA in my “2016 Christmas Fund Raiser”. Come on, all. I have gone to great lengths to produce this card, and also embarrass myself doing it. Surely that’s worth a tenner, an “Uncle Ben” as our Cockney friends would say?

Remember it’s all in the name of charity!

So if you want to see the new Bragg family, donate to my One Way or Another just giving page. I will then monitor over the next 8 weeks and perhaps the card will be revealed early or only on the 25th December, or tragically you might only get a Robin Bird Card! It’s your choice. Remember the Robin card!! Or if you are really bad, it might be a snowman.

I cannot believe it is over a year now since I started my blog. I have made a lot of new friends since, fellow bloggers and people and family affected by MND.

I know Christmas is still 8 weeks away, but like last year I will publish my blog at 3pm Christmas Day, but make sure you record the Queen’s speech.

On the subject of puzzles, I am reminded of a story when our son was young, about 4 years old. We had a break-in  in our shed (outhouse) and thieves stole our lawnmower, power drill and Jig-saw.

Howard, as an inquisitive child, was interested and we told him “Some vile bad scum, son, has violated our privacy and taken the drill, the jig-saw and the lawnmower“. His eyes lit up, like only a child’s could, fascinated and terrified at the same time.

Anyway, several weeks later, once his trauma had subsided, we were on holiday with friends and their young children. Howard, of course was laughing and playing, and he started to tell the story of the burglars that took our garden tools to his friends. His very words were;

Yeah. We had a break-in. Yeah!”

“What was taken?”

“Well, they took away our lawn mower, Dad’s drill and a puzzle!”

We laughed!

A lot of travel this week. It was half term, and Jean was not working. So we took the chance to visit North Wales, although I wish Jean can have a slightly gentler foot on the brake! Mars bar being eaten for ***** sake.

image

As usual, North Wales was beautiful, but their share of “off their head psycho” drivers does make the last few miles of driving a bit hairy. Where were the Welsh Police?!

Whilst in Wales, I was introduced to this…

image

This is a gadget Jean’s Uncle had purchased to aid blood circulation, and he suggested I try it for my condition! Basically it is a device that would not be out-of-place in a theatre of rendition torture chamber! The gadget has a remote control, and you can change the “electric shock” power. Good party game really.

Oh, I haven’t had a WTFWTTO (What the **** were they thinking of) item for a while. This week one of my most hated items in the world. This..

image
Yes, hot air hand driers. I despise these things. This one was in a disabled toilet (restroom) in Starbuck’s on the way home. It did the traditional thing of NOT starting when waving hands underneath! Am I an alien or something? And then, for no apparent reason, other than to scare the living day lights out of me, blasts into action. It nearly blew me off of my feet (not joking). Not funny. I hope the inventor of these spends time in hell with one whilst attempting to balance a cup of cappuccino.

Through the wonders of the Internet, once back across the border in England I was able to watch Prime Ministers Question’s (PMQs). For my international friends, PMQs is a weekly 45 minute slot in Parliament where MPs ask our Prime Minister (Theresa May) questions. It is actually quite entertaining, and because you can say anything (and I mean anything) in Parliament without being sued (parliamentary privilege), it can be fun.

Anyway, here is the lovely Theresa.

image

Since becoming PM two things have been absent from her appearance. I refer you back to my Budget post earlier this year. So besides the fact her dressmaker spends more on fabric these days, she now has also a great penchant for necklaces, and in particular beads. This week’s neck attire was pretty awesome, although I actually think they are the testicles of her front bench members on a string and she gives them back after the questions!

One part of our trip back from Wales that I enjoy is the M6 Toll road. My international readers might say, “What is so special about a toll road?” Well, we in the UK have very few, and the ones we have are empty, and so one can reach warp speed, and everybody does. I wondered if there was another reason for this, and then I noticed this toll road sign.

image

Managed to squeeze in a physio on my return from Wales, and also get one of our cars MOTed. The MOT (Ministry of transport) test, is the UK Government’s test of road worthiness for cars that are 3 years old or more, carried out yearly.

I guess it’s the same all round the world and that you dread the phone call from the garage. Thank God these people don’t work on Doctor’s surgery helplines!

Good afternoon, Mr Millard. All done, nothing too serious to discuss!!” Jeesh putting you at ease. All was fine, and the car is not scrap yet.

Other news this week. We have new neighbours, how exciting. I must admit my immediate worry was going to be the explaining of my MND and that

You are not living next door to a drunk stumbler”

However, I should not have been worried, they knew about me! News spreads! So looking forward to getting to know them, perhaps they may even have a Bragg character!

Next week I am having hydrotherapy. I think I might scare the nurse and get some of Lord Bragg’s Olympic swimming trunks out.  Ok folks. Same time next week, unless I am arrested for gross indecency.

STOP PRESS

Don’t forget #BraggsXmasCard2016! And please share my blog by whatever means. Tell people about the Bragg family as introduced in my intro post, and encourage donations to One Way or Another! We can beat MND/ALS! If are so kind to donate, please add the hashtag #BraggsXmasCard2016 to the comments in your donation.