What on earth is ChuckleDonate? I hear you exclaim. It is a new software system that I am developing to detect “chuckles” by my readers. If the titillation is above a set threshold, it should then immediately “take” a donation for the MNDA. Cunning, huh! It is not quite working yet and I will update you at the end of the post. But before all that, it’s Christmas!!!!!! Enjoy!!!

Welcome to the onein400 Christmas post! I am pleased to say that this is my second Christmas outpouring. Cheers and moans all around I sense. Just like your favourite auntie/uncle visiting, I am here to surprise, annoy and shock you.

First. I hope the turkey has gone down well, or as one of my Polish friends told me this week, your carp! I have been informed that a typical Polish Christmas feast is the fish carp which is traditionally kept alive in the house bath for a full week before the big day! The crazy Polish! Next year, mind you, I might keep a penguin in the bath during December! Now on Christmas Day, that’s 12 hours at gas mark 5, I understand!

And here we go, yes it’s the one and only Bragg family Christmas card to you all; in aid of the wonderful MNDA! Yes, it’s legendary Dolly Bragg, along with Hank Bragg and Lord Lee all wearing that same MNDA T-shirt they passed around, wishing you a happy Christmas! Thank you to the Braggs. So far I have raised about £300 from my little caper. Every penny counts team.

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When Lord Lee Bragg found out that he was related to the lovely Dolly Bragg only last year, he decided it was about time to research his family tree. Where did he come from? Last Christmas he settled down with a glass of whisky, a nice pair of slippers, and a load of VAT free cigarettes to watch a Christmas Day movie. He spotted a couple of clues in the film Spartacus. Note the slightly shifty character trying to avoid being chosen for a fight with a gladiator!

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This eerie likeness spurred him on, and a further clue appeared in the escape scene. He found out after a long search that he is actually descended from Braggacus, a Roman gladiator, who also owned a business in fencing and gating.

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What are you lot laughing at? If you make a few calculations, with the passage of time, and the 80 or so generations since Roman times, Braggacus actually has a vast number of potential direct line descendants. So there is probably a bit of Braggism in all of us! Sorry everyone!

Just think about it? Don’t you fume at some things, but then bite your lip? The price of turkeys, Christmas trees etc?

Lord Bragg did actually invite Dolly Bragg for Christmas, but there were no first class plane tickets left. Surely she could have come, after all she doesn’t need much leg room being a short country girl? However, she told a waiting airport reporter

I need breathing room!”

In the run up to the Christmas weekend, Jean and I have been planning more house changes so that we can remain in the home that we love. This time it was the turn of plumbers and gas fitters. Estimates, estimates! We need to change our boiler to make space for the new bathroom area changes. The good news is, because of MND, I am able to legally fund the entire bathroom refit VAT free. This of course, means a lot.

Back to Lord Bragg’s family tree. Unfortunately, nearly 2000 years after Braggacus, he found that he had a rather nasty relative, in the shape of Ebenezer Bragg, who was the most ungenerous soul to inhabit the earth.

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Thank goodness I haven’t inherited his miserliness!

My next post will be on Sunday, my first in 2017. Soon to come early in January 2017 a further MND research update with my view of the progress being made.

And finally, I have one more big request of you.

It’s ChuckleDonate. It is simply not working. Can I ask you to do it manually?

Below you will see two photos. If you have chuckled, please press the “I am as happy as Lord Bragg” photo and follow the donation instructions.

Alternatively, please press the “I didn’t chuckle just like Ebenezer” photo and beware, where will Ebenezer take you????!!!!

You must press one photo I am watching!!

I am as happy as Lord Bragg

I didn’t chuckle just like Ebenezer

Same time next week viewers, New Year’s Day. See you all then. But perhaps (only perhaps) not those who may have pressed the wrong button, hahahahahah, hahahahahah, woooo, wooooo!